Bride seeing ceremonies have a very distinct effect on me - a mixture of disgust, despair, annoyance and a little bit of hope. Curiously though, that negligible amount of hope seems to sway my entire reasoning towards submission. And after going through the routine, I have become used to it, even though I still get the urge to do something nasty to the unsuspecting groom's party. Even though I protest rather loudly, I am no more rebellious about this subject as I was before; especially when I am painfully aware that I myself have failed in this department rather miserably.
Finally, after spending five hundred buck on a shrink who said, I need to find a right guy for myself (duh! as if I don't know.) I decided that some soul searching is needed in this department. So, I sat down and really thought; not my usual flashes of genius type but by aid of a series of questions raised by the great sage, Yavanshi.
Q: What am I looking for?
A: Someone who would see me as an individual and not as a mass product of society (well, no one seems to want custom made stuff anymore. Made in India's simmering cauldron of social zombism is the preferred brand for brides, and needless to say, I don't fit the bill.)
Q: Why would I marry?
A:Obviously for love (what? did I say something funny.)
Q: Do I really need to marry?
A: If I will be better of married that single then yes, otherwise no. And that's solely dependent on my tolerance level to the unlucky chap, if ever there is one. And that in turn is dependent on how much I can love him.
Q: Whom would I love?
A: Hum, a guy I can respect. Someone who would love me enough to be there as the warm home I can get back to after wandering the worlds. Someone who will not only patch me up but also accept me patching him up when the need arises. (Someone tell me if I just eliminated the entire male population of the earth.) Oh yeah, and someone who is like minded enough to toss ideas like adoption and some noodles when I am tired. (Now that completes the elimination I suppose.)
Q: What can I give?
A: Love and understanding (like why men prefer football games to their wives), leeway (like he can have lunch,only, with a female friend but better be home for dinner), consideration (spare him the girl shopping) and freedom of thought (he can think and say that my violin playing skill are scientifically subzero and I won't cry, though i might still keep at it even harder.)
Q: Do I want to get married?
A: To the right guy yes. To the wrong one, I would rather run all the way to the north pole.
Q: Have I looked for Mr right?
A: Well, don't know how do that. At least I haven't asked men if they are married or otherwise within the first five minutes of knowing them.
Yavanshi, the great sage thought for a while and then finally gave her verdict.
"You are looking for a highly endangered species. Even if you find one, it will be a crime to waste him on you. But if by chance you do get Mr right, then that goes down in history as a miracle."
Why do we always hope for miracles? Even when we know it doesn't happen often these days. Same reason why we buy pop corn at the theater knowing very well it will cost ten times that of its actual price; coz its a luxury to hope.
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2 comments:
The great sage Yavanshi seems to have missed out something. Why at all waste time in searching for the right partner, when there are so many more important things to be done?
Otherwise, the sage has been extremely honest. And, as indeed you seem to have realized, you are searching for a lost breed.
Same reason why we dress up, go to movies, eat good food, and generally like the niceties of life - because it is fun (supposedly). Another reason is that you don't have keep telling people why you like to spend time with someone. You marry that person and society will stop nagging you.
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